I knew I was bored,  and my skills were not being tested on a daily basis… but what was it, I wondered?

As a columnist for the Orlando Business Journal, I regularly was invited to the Full Sail University’s public and private events.  I always went full of anticipation because I learned that the events were always done up right, with  millions of extra surprises at every turn.

I had been looking into online universities to update my skills, but during that time, kept visiting Full Sail.  Finally, on a job board, I saw a post that looked interesting, and applied.  I never heard back!

So, as any resourceful person, I contacted my childhood friend there who was now a Vice President and asked her to present my resume.  In turn, she invited me to an open house the school has. That was where I officially became blown away by the school, it’s mission and where it was headed!

I decided right there to find a job at Full Sail. I found the creative people I always enjoyed hanging with and they found a way to make money at it!  I happened to run into the President of the University and introduced myself. He invited me to his office, and the rest is history.   I interviewed several places on campus and settled in at the admissions office.

I’ve now been there for about 6 weeks and couldn’t be more happy. The culture, the people, the job and the opportunity were exactly what I needed.  A new challenge, with dynamic people,  and working on a team who genuinely want to inspire people to be their best!

So if you’re looking for something new.. GO FIND IT! It probably won’t come knocking at your door. Try new things. Go to events. Show up and TALK.  Introduce yourself, and be open.

You just might find something new.. and even better than you could  have hoped!!!

I  got to the car wash and had 3 one dollar bills tucked away. I scrounged around for another 4 quarters because it costs $4 for me to wash my SUV.  I found the three, then looked and looked and looked for that last blasted quarter. I searched the car, the seats, and the bowels of my purse, to no avail.  I figured, that the good Lord always knows what he’s doing, so I guessed I was going to have to ask someone, and I knew, that because I prayed to find one last quarter and didn’t, that this was supposed to happen that morning.

So, I wandered to the next car over to a man who was starting the process of getting his money out to wash his own car. I said, “Hi, I was wondering, well, I have 3 quarters, and I have two Nickels and a dime, I mean, two dimes, and a Nickel, and I need, ….”   His response was so calm and so focused and so perfect, … he said to me, “Talk to me.”

I looked up at him, now, not flustered whatsoever and I said clearly, “can I exchange what I have for your quarter?”  He did it without even saying another word and I thanked him and walked away.

I was able to clean my car but those simple words just stuck with me.  TALK TO ME.  TALK TO ME.

How I long to talk with someone. Really talk with someone.  I would tell him about the many perils of life right now that I’m challenging or that someone in my life is  facing.  I would dump it all and then wait for the next perfect words in the world, “it’s all going to be okay.”

When I pulled away, I stopped and rolled my window down and told the man, “Your words were brilliant. You just said something that I’m going to share with everyone… you said some very profound and important words, “talk to me.”

He laughed and came over to the car and told me that women can rarely get to the point quickly and he’s found, that if he just cuts to the chase in a calm way, it wakes them up and gets them to just say what they mean.  We both had a good laugh over this, because I have taught that same communication technique to SO many women over the years, but when I’m in my own flustered state, I revert back to communicating like God probably intended.. so we’d drive the men bonkers!

We ended up talking some more and sharing about our lives and I learned about his martial arts which fascinate me and I might try at some point.

But those three very simple and profound words, that he uttered to me in just a quick minute.. will stay with me for ever, and they will be the gift that I give to others, when I know they need it.

Talk to me.

And I will listen…

Talk to me… and I will care.

Talk to me.. and I will let you know, that you will be fine, because God is really there.

A few years ago I attended and was honored to be the Master of Ceremonies at the National Sensory Processing Disorder Conference in Chicago.

At that time, I was able to view and hear about many therapies that work for kids who struggle with attention, ADHD, ADD,  Autism, or sensory issues.  The one that I found that I wanted to try for my son, was the ILS program.  Integrated Listening Systems, an auditory program, is the “Mac daddy” of all of the auditory programs. It’s a system you can use with your OT or one that you can purchase and use from home to improve focus.  www.integratedlistening.com

When I tried it out by putting on the headset and listening to the music, I immediately felt calmer.  It’s classical music thats just beautiful and puts you in a state of “ahhhh, life is awesome” mood!!

I wanted to use the system at home, and the time just wasn’t right, but FINALLY, I was able to catch up with life enough to get the speaker and trainer to come over from Tampa a few weeks ago and to tell her story about how it’s improved her own family!

She has three kids, all of which have been on the program. One of her children was surely to have been diagnosed on the autism spectrum at a young age.   He had sensory issues, focus issue, had an IEP with the school and was special needs. She did the program with him for a few years, although in the first two months, the results were DONE. She was able to effectively rewire his brain!

This child is now in high school. He’s a star athlete and student. He has many friends and she knows that it was THIS program that turned his life around and put in him on solid ground.

I’m reading up on the ILS system now.. and will be taking the training. I’m thrilled and look forward to reporting in on the changes in our household.

I told my son.. it’ll help your sports.. and with THAT.. he announced: “LETS GET STARTED”!!!

Just gotta know their buttons… and now… we’re off and running!!!

Both women looked at me with a little bit of “excuse me?” look, but then I proceeded to tell them how blue green algae is an anti inflammatory and how magnets can be used for pain. I explained how my husband was able to heal his torn rotator cuff by using some energy magnet medicine by Nikken, a company in which I’m representing. I shared that my son sleeps on a magnet mattress and the day after we added the magnet mattress and water filter system, the teacher asked in disbelief, “WHAT HAPPENED?? He was a different child and SO focused!”

By this time, the ladies were asking for specific names and asked for my email and my phone number which I freely gave. I’ve learned that people are incredibly open to receiving help from strangers, even if they didn’t know they really wanted it!

When I listen to myself talk, I have to admit, I’ve finally learned a thing or two about healthy living. I know that I started on this journey several years ago, but am getting more and more serious about it. I’m finding I don’t have the patience for any aches and pains, and realize that there is a cause and effect for every single thing. If my pinky is swollen up, then I realize, I must have eaten too much sugar. If I have a symptom like my arms falling asleep, then I know that I digested gluten somewhere along the way.

I’m starting to recognize the symptoms in others. When someone has dark circles under their eyes, I ask them if they have checked what food sensitivities they have? If someone has eczema, I ask if they’ve heard about how gluten in the diet can cause skin issues? More than once, I’ve gone up to individuals with severe acne and given them my vitamin formula that knocks out even the toughest form of acne!

The interesting and exciting thing is that there is SO much to learn about healthy living. I will never know everything, but I’m learning many things. It’s a fun course of study, and although I’m doing it because I’m a mom and raising a child, it’s something that all of us can do to benefit ourselves.

My family is already gluten free, and mostly dairy free, and moving more towards a plant based diet. It’s hard to eliminate mean 100% of the time now, but we’re cooking more and more fish, and eating more beans and alternative meat products.

It’s exciting, and hopefully as we age, there will be some other rewards, like healthy living, and of course.. looking much younger than I really am!

Do you remember a time when you had a special event to go to, so you spent time pouring through magazines to find the right look, hair style, jewelry and accessories? Then you finally went shopping to find the right dress, the right makeup, the right shoes, and handbag. Finally, you were ready to put the puzzle together. You spend the day getting your hair done, your nails, pedicure.. the works!!! And the night of the event, you step out and there you are.. the beauty you were meant to be!

No wonder most of us don’t look like the Hollywood Glam Girls! Their whole world is dedicated to their looks, but the rest of us know.. IT TAKES TIME!!!

This past weekend I had a ball to attend. I knew that I had a couple of dresses in my closet so I wasn’t overly worried. Yet on the day before the event, I pulled out the dresses and DISASTER STRUCK! Nothing fit! And the one dress that DID fit had a stain on the front of the dress!!! Intuitively, I knew that I was going to have to be creative with my outfits, and figured, “why worry about it.. no one is going to care what I wear!”

But.. next out came the Spanx; and now it was time for a little creativity! I ran to the craft store to see if I could doctor up the dress any way with sequins and finally used the home dry cleaning kit which cleaned up the stain. I jumped in the car and ran up to a store on Park Avenue that sells the most fun “bling” I know, and purchased an enormous ring that says: I’m the QUEEN for the day… and a bracelet that make me feel glamorous. I redid my nails, put on a fake tan, and spent most of the time straightening my now somewhat curly hair.

Finally, the look came completely together when we popped over to some friends’ house and in the closet I spied tome Mink Stoles. I whispered a possible.. “do you think I can wear….” And my friend JUMPED in to offer me the perfect antique shoulder stole. It was beautiful!

Now, with about a half an hour to doll up, I got to work! I already looked different with my hair straightened, so I focused in on making my eyes pop. The fake tan gave me a healthy look.. and before I knew it, I was transformed!!

When I stepped out to see my parents who were there to baby, they were WOWED. The outfit was really spectacular, and most importantly, I felt beautiful!!!

The funny thing is, is that I dress for success every day at work. But I don’t have the time to put into myself that I did for this event. I’m a full time working mom, and don’t have an hour a day to do my fake tan, and all of the extras that it takes to look as good as I can. Yet, I have to admit, it was FUN and I am SO glad I did it!

What it’s given me is the jump start to knowing that how we FEEL is an important component in how we ACT. The night I was made up, I acted like a Queen and was treated like royalty. Its given me confidence to know that even thought I’m not in the shape I want to be, that I’m not that far away.. and I know I can get there.

How many of us miss the opportunities that are presented to us because we don’t FEEL the part? How many times to we give up before we event attempt to try? We know we can’t get to where we want to go, so we just don’t start the process to get there.

I learned this weekend. JUMP IN. Move towards what which what you want… and do what you can within your power and then have faith that God will take care of the other special details along the way.

So go for it, glam up your life, accept that opportunity, and say YES, even though you have nothing to wear and don’t feel prepared! You might just find, your 1940s glam mink stole, just right around the corner!

So much has happened.  You’ll now find me on Facebook.. marykgardner and motivating, sharing and connecting! I write about social media for the Orlando Business Journal but have greatly missed my blog.. so now.. I’m back.. and in the works..are some other things I will explore!!!

The book is done and about to be released. I released Blessed Chaos to a few special needs families and was warmly received.   By sharing our story, many people have been able to relate and have told me their own stories of BLESSED CHAOS!

I’m now working full time at Lamm and Company Partners, which I love! I’m the director of Business Development, marketing and PR.   I enjoy the work and the people with whom I’m working… so the change has been great.  Sway is taking care a lot more of the house duties.. and we’ve discovered he’s a WONDERFUL cook!!!  Our son continues to thrive in sports, school and music.  (although he now wants to change all of his activities b/c he says he hates swimming and piano)!!!  mgardner@lammco.com

Our live is back on track and going great. I’m starting to put together my next book on living the GLUTEN free lifestyle.. and diary free… which has helped us out a TON.

So, I’ll be updating and recreating ..creating and innovating.. as much as possible.. and seeing where life takes us!

Glad to be back and hope you’re well!!!

Mary

I’ve been busy behind the scenes with my book: Blessed Chaos! I’m working diligently with a new editor who is making it better than it was before… so that’s been a lengthy project but one that I hope you’ll find beneficial to families who are raising “unique” kids!

Also, I did my first marathon at Disney a few weeks ago! It was excruciatingly painful because it was the coldest day of the year and one of the coldest days on record that Florida has had in about 20 years. It even snowed! There was ice on the ground! People slipped at the water stops that froze over. It was difficult to keep the body from freezing too.. so let me say, it wasn’t something that I’d like to repeat soon. But, after it was all said and done, I got a nice medal, and had an experience with euphoria when I realized.. I RAN A MARATHON!  Still, my time reflected a novice runner, so I’m getting back in the game again and training harder for NEXT TIME!

Professionally, I’ve started a business with two amazing women: Linnette Padron and Cheryl Hardy. Our new business is called Persimmon and our website is www.persimmonventures.com   We’re doing PR/Marketing for a variety of projects and people.. including my book!  If you have any projects that we should take a look at you can write us at info@persimmonventures.com or mary@persimmonventures.com. 

Always nice to correspond with friends around the country and thanks for keeping up with me on Facebook and Twitter. I hope to continue to learn about the world of Autism as well as mental, physical and spiritual health.

Thanks for checking in and I look forward to posting more! Mary

In business, it seems to be less offensive than in one’s personal life. In business, if someone doesn’t return calls it is usually because the person isn’t quite ready to do business. Perhaps they haven’t made a decision or they are working on another project. Perhaps they don’t want or need your services and so they’re saving face by not returning the calls. Casual persistence is the best way to handle these people. And dropping a hand written note with valuable information is always a good tactic. Sometimes, by adding enough value you are able to charm the person into returning or taking your calls. A rule of thumb though is to NEVER, EVER make them feel guilty for not returning the calls. It’s best to pass it off and never mention it again. It’s past history!

In business and in friendships there are usually good excuses why people aren’t returning calls.  Okay, there are times that a relationship will be put on hold due to some of the choices we make. And there are cases that a relationship is over due to the differences in values that people have.  Or, perhaps they’ve found another vender who is more affordable and they don’t have the guts to tell you.   But normally, it doesn’t happen like this. Normally, there is something else going on.

For instance:

The other person had a death in the family and is having to attend a funeral.

They are in the process of moving offices or homes.

They are at a business conference.
They are having some financial issues and getting together for lunch or dinner is not in the budget.

They have many other pressing business matters that need their attention first.

Okay, you now get the picture! People are BUSY. Taking it personal that someone isn’t calling or emailing you back is probably natural, but not practical. We are living in a different day and time now and the old days of everyone returning calls immediately has now changed to, “I’ll call you back when I can.”

Returning calls and emails is the polite thing to do. My dad once told me to always be the last one to write or call and to never leave people hanging. It’s great advice and it’s advice I share with others. But I also have tolerance for others when they are slow to move as quickly as I am at that moment.

My friend Kelly Price of Kelly Price & Company has it all figured out. Her business of real estate is all about relationships and so she makes it a point to be efficient, and organized.  Kelly switched from a paper calendar to electronic through Outlook to book appointments with her friends and clients. In her business, time of the essence so she sends a request for a meeting and once the person accepts, it gets put on both of their personal calendar. Kelly told me there is “no more phone tag” and loves the simplicity.

Blogspot Radio host and author Kerry Heaps of www.kerrysnetwork.com prefers the good old fashioned notebook to manage her phone calls. She agrees with the statistic that it takes 5-6 outgoing calls to get a returned call and by then the person is usually thanking her for her persistence!  Her method of stapling business cards to the notebook to keep a running long of her phone activity, she believes still works well for the “visual” person.

In a day in time where connecting solely by phone is almost in the past, people have to first figure out what system the person is using to communicate with others the most – Email? Texting? Twitter, Linked In, Plaxo or Facebook? Do they Skype? Teleconference?  Or do they use the good ol’ fashioned phone! But then you have to know, do they use their land line or their cell phone? So many choices! 

Most people find, that if you want to talk with someone, do what you can to make it happen by phone. When you finally are on the phone together, it’s time to seal the deal!
Because who has time to go through all of this with every vendor!? 

Phone calls are not out of style, but managing them has evolved.   Take time to create a system that works for you so you can increase the ease and efficiency in your business. And soon with all of the happy clients, people will be calling YOU.

 I just read a stat that 80% of HR directors are now using Social Networking – LINKED IN, to hire their recruits.

 WOW… things sure have changed!

 I can see, through my own usage, that I’m getting opportunities right and left on FACEBOOK and meeting lots of national players on TWITTER. It seems that TWITTER is a marketing tool and FACEBOOK is more social, and yet, there is personal business done on FB.

 So, I’ll be better about updating the blog. My column is back in the Orlando Business Journal so I AM writing… and check out my  NEW PODCAST: marygardner.mypodcast.com. Most of these are directed at parents who are raising children on the AUTISM spectrum or who have ADHD, but they’re all about HEALTH and WELLNESS, so any of them are fine for ANY of us!

 Thanks for being back in touch!!!

I’ve been absent for a few months but I’m back! 

I have been transforming.. in nearly EVERY area of my life. As my good friend Giovanni Livera says in his speeches, that we have to RESET our life and goals and expectations occasionally.  That is what I’ve been doing.

I’ve also been READING and STUDYING about health. We’ve adapted the GLUTEN FREE lifestyle as a family and have been studying about nutrition, cooking vegetarian and organic and learning about COOKING and FOOD.

I’m also training for a MARATHON – which is scheduled in January 2010- the Disney Marathon. I’m running with Track Shack in Orlando, and enjoying it a lot. I’m up to 7 miles so far, which is what I did today.

I’ve been landscaping my yard, decorating my home and deciding what to do with my next step professionally. Since I’m a coach and trainer, I’m adding some products to my arsenal and will continue to go down the path of WELLNESS in my career. Coaching is great, but to have products and other associates who can serve my clients… that’s an added bonus. 

Sway, my husband, redid my website as you can see, and I have been working on that and learning how to use it. I’ve written several articles but didn’t post them.. yet. 

I hope to be launching my book soon.. and will share about that later. In the meantime, I hope you’ll come back and read my blogs and updates.. and let me know what’s on your mind!  My clients are re-launching too..and I’m excited to be back in the seat with them as well.

More to come! Mary