A few years ago I attended and was honored to be the Master of Ceremonies at the National Sensory Processing Disorder Conference in Chicago.

At that time, I was able to view and hear about many therapies that work for kids who struggle with attention, ADHD, ADD,  Autism, or sensory issues.  The one that I found that I wanted to try for my son, was the ILS program.  Integrated Listening Systems, an auditory program, is the “Mac daddy” of all of the auditory programs. It’s a system you can use with your OT or one that you can purchase and use from home to improve focus.  www.integratedlistening.com

When I tried it out by putting on the headset and listening to the music, I immediately felt calmer.  It’s classical music thats just beautiful and puts you in a state of “ahhhh, life is awesome” mood!!

I wanted to use the system at home, and the time just wasn’t right, but FINALLY, I was able to catch up with life enough to get the speaker and trainer to come over from Tampa a few weeks ago and to tell her story about how it’s improved her own family!

She has three kids, all of which have been on the program. One of her children was surely to have been diagnosed on the autism spectrum at a young age.   He had sensory issues, focus issue, had an IEP with the school and was special needs. She did the program with him for a few years, although in the first two months, the results were DONE. She was able to effectively rewire his brain!

This child is now in high school. He’s a star athlete and student. He has many friends and she knows that it was THIS program that turned his life around and put in him on solid ground.

I’m reading up on the ILS system now.. and will be taking the training. I’m thrilled and look forward to reporting in on the changes in our household.

I told my son.. it’ll help your sports.. and with THAT.. he announced: “LETS GET STARTED”!!!

Just gotta know their buttons… and now… we’re off and running!!!

The one thing that IS inevitable. You are going to die. I mean, one day, we’ll ALL die. And what happens to the people who are left here on earth?

Usually, there is complete shock at the whole thing. Either your death will be slow, or it’ll be quick with no warning. Heck, I think God every day that I could have met my maker last week when I stepped in front of a bus’s path without knowing. I could have been HISTORY that day. But I guess it wasn’t my time yet… Thank heavens! I still have a lot of living to do.

What got me thinking was me meeting two individuals on my trip who are in the funeral business. One of them sells vaults for funeral homes, and the other is a funeral director. So, it was one conversation that I’d never entered into before, but it made me think a lot.

What kind of funeral do I want? Who is going to show up? How are they all going to hear about it? Where will it be? Will I be buried in a casket or will I be cremated? Where do I want a tombstone to mark my grave? What do I want written on the tombstone?

I’d like to think that I’m going to have a massive party. I know that my life has touched others in a deep and positive way along the road, but I don’t want people to grieve over my passing when it happens. No, I want them to party, just like I want them to do when I’m around. I want them to laugh, have fun, and celebrate my life in style.

Think about it. If you write all of this down in advance, the people who are left behind who are grieving won’t have to think about the details. How are they going to know that you want the BEACH BOYS music playing or Earth Wind and Fire so that people will be in a GOOD mood at the funeral instead of the usual somber mood that usually takes precedence?

What poems will be read? What about what you want to give to whom? Do you have a favorite piece of jewelry you want to pass on or even a pet to give to someone in your family? You wouldn’t want your pets to end up in the pound would you?

These are the types of questions that the living has to answer when the dead depart us. It’s a lot of thinking that goes in, and so it just makes sense to answer these questions before you go on to meet your maker.

Bill, the General Manager of the Resthaven Park Cemetery in Glendale, AZ, who I met in an airport on my travels, was kind enough to send me the Personal Planning Guide by Dignity Memorial (www.dignitymemorial.com) This is a beautifully laid out workbook that organizes all of your personal documents such as your will, your banking, credit cards, bills and other financial or estate matters. Then it has detailed pages for your medical history, social security information and who to contact in the event of your death. It’s got space to fill out about your own funeral such as if you want to have an open casket or be cremated. You get to chose where to spread your assets or rather to keep the remains in a keepsake memorial.

Seriously… have you ever given this any thought whatsoever?

You get to choose which jewelry you’ll be buried with and even what you want to wear. (Gosh, what WILL I wear???) Then you get to pick your Pallbearers and Honorary Pallbearers.

It is a complete view of your whole life so this workbook can be passed on through the generations as a library on your life. It covers all of the basis and no stone is left unturned.

With all of the stress that we have in our lives these days, why force others to do the seemingly unthinkable planning for us? Why not face the inevitable and acknowledge that our lives on this earth will one day end and start with the end in mind. That way it’ll be easy to do the “Rocking Chair” test on yourself.

When you are 99 years old, and sitting on your rocking chair on your front porch, what do you want to say that your life was about? What were you committed to? Who were you committed to? Did you love fully? Did you give of yourself to others? Did you waste time? What other things would you have wanted to accomplish in your life?

If you can do this test and you haven’t accomplished all that you set out to do, then what is holding you back?

It’ll be helpful for you to take some time to write all of these things down on paper. Statistics show that by writing your goals down on paper you are more likely to achieve them. Perhaps you can then start checking your lifetime goals off one by one!

This is a great way to keep you invested and growing in your life. And there is absolutely NOTHING to get you more motivated then actually planning your own funeral!!

COMMENTS
Mary – glad to hear you are OK!!

And, just to be provocative…

Is life about accomplishing things in life…is it about doing…or being? I’m finding out that it’s more important who I’m being, than what I’m doing.

Love you, Leslie (NY)

Funeral? I’m going with Rodney Dangerfield: “Give my body to science, or science, fiction, whoever will have me!” (Brendan, NJ)

I already planned mine—just dig a hole and throw me in—don’t spend a lot of cash—then go have a beer—no need to be sad, I had fun while I was here. Give my stuff (surfboard, bike, etc) to someone who will use it.

YO
(S.R- Charlotte)

We had about 10 people show up for breakfast. We went to the Waffle House and were crammed in the booths with cups of coffee, pancakes, eggs, toast, bacon and hash brown side dishes every where the eye could see.

One of the couples, SR and Christa got there early and were about done by the time several of us arrived. SR is a very intense sort of guy. He works out 3 times a day either with swimming, running, weights or biking. He’s in great shape and at a young age, runs a very large organization as a top manager and executive. He’s one of those types who literally likes to “suffer” so he pushes himself beyond belief.

Today, he was pushing the staff at the Waffle House. He was done so he wanted to get to work. He had been given the bill earlier and now couldn’t find it. He looked everywhere.. on the floor, in the kitchen on the other side of our booth and it was no where to be found. Soon he had several of the staff running around trying to find it while the others were trying to rewrite a ticket. The staff was all yelling across the room in Spanish trying to locate the lost ticket or to decide who served him and could they verify what should be on the ticket.

Not only were the staff running around like mice all over looking for this ticket but our two tables got into the action of trying to help him. Finally, he sat up, and felt something. YEP.. it was the TICKET! He had been sitting on it the whole time.

Our whole table erupted in laughter. SR’s face turned a deep purple, then pink which is highly exaggerated against his blondish red hair. He felt a tad foolish for getting everyone to jump through hoops and he was the one who had it all along. But the rest of us laughed so hard we felt we got an amazing workout in those few minutes alone.

One of the guys is a pharmaceutical sales rep announced some healthy statistics about laughter. He said that if you laugh just 15 minutes a day you can lower your risk of heart disease by 10%. Those are pretty amazing statistics. And not to be outdone, I had to come home and do a little research myself on those statistics.

For one thing, many researchers considered laughter as the best aerobic exercise. According to William Fry, a professor at Stanford University, California, a good belly laugh works muscles all over the body and improves blood circulation. Fry agrees that one minute of laughter equals ten minutes on the rowing machine. In other words, laughter stimulates the heart and blood circulation equivalent to any other standard aerobic exercise (qtd. in Kataria). Moreover, laughter is a powerful tool to increase lung capacity. Dr Kataria agrees that laughter can be beneficial for singers and actors. It helps them gain a better control over speech. Another benefit for them would be the improvement of self-confidence and the reduction of panic. Furthermore, experts say that laughter makes people look younger. When we are walking or running, all the muscles of the body are exercising. However, there is no regular exercise designated for facial muscles. Sometimes, when we laugh, our faces become red because of the augmentation in blood supply, which feeds the facial skin and makes it radiant. Laughing people are more likely to look attractive and happy (2-3). Finally, laughter provides an excellent source for cardiac exercise according to McGhee. He suggests the next time we are having a good bout laugh to put the hand over the heart when we stop laughing. We will notice that the heart is racing even after 20 seconds. He compares laughter to internal jogging and concludes that an individual is able to give his heart many good calisthenics every day by laughing (5). All in all, the physical benefits of laughter are powerful tools to exercise the body. (http://www.ivygreen.ctc.edu/gPeitsch/rwr_2.htm)

So, according to the experts, I got at least an extra half an hour of aerobic exercise today. I think that I held a belly laugh for about 3-4 minutes so that would be approx. 30 min on the row machine.

I’d say it was the most fun work out I’ve had in ages. Now if I can just figure out how to get the belly laugh workout to equal a swim practice, I’d be in shape AND happy!