Today I wrote a sentimental letter to about 10 people who I considered my closest friends from when I was a little kid. I reminded them of the fun relays we used to have, and the swim meets where we spent time unified as a team, and reminded my first boyfriend of our childhood dates to McDonalds. It was a simpler time then, when as 8 and 10 year olds, we could ride our bikes a couple of miles to the pool by ourselves, spend the whole day and come home for dinner. We’d stay and play after swim practice and our parents didn’t have a care in the world because they knew who everyone was and that all of us were being taken care of by the other parents.

Thinking back to the old times and to the people that we were has been a wonderful experience for me. None of us had really gone through any awkward social times by that time, and all of the boys and girls hung out with each other with no expectations and no agendas. I remember years later when my first boyfriend from 7th grade made fun of me in front of others in high school and I remember thinking that he had changed somehow, and that he was no longer the boy who I knew “way back then.” I publicly ignored his taunting, but it did hurt to know that we didn’t share that special friendship any more.

Then, he grew up and became a very successful and powerful professional in the Orlando area and someone I’d probably never have the chance to meet as an adult. But today in an email, I reminded him of whom he was when he was 9 years old, and who I was and I know that he smiled when he clicked the “send” button to let me know that he’d love to come to a swim team reunion.

Our coach was one of the most important people in my life. He believed in me and told me on the side of the pool one day that I could be anybody I wanted to be in life.. He told me that if I worked hard, if I wanted to swim in the Olympics, that I had the talent to do so. While that never came true, I still remember feeling special, and often credited him as the person who gave me that extra push in life.

Last night when I was reminiscing due to spending time at the “old” pool, but not seeing anyone have NEAR as much fun as we used to have, I decided to throw an old reunion for my former team members. So this morning I wrote to as many people as possible from the old team and reminded them of the good ol’ days. I wrote about the pizza parties, the relays, the late summer nights, the slumber parties, the swim meets and the pranks we pulled on each other. Then I told them that they were all very special to me, and that I’d love to see them again and suggested we have a reunion. I shared with them that I’ve been to too many funerals lately, and it seems that too many people share the same thought: “I wish I would have told him how special he was to me.”

So now, I sit at my computer anxiously awaiting the response. Will they think I’m incredibly corny? Will they be embarrassed for the stories I told? Will they want to forget those ol’ Happy Days and not live in the past? Or will they chuckle and for a moment, revert back to being a kid in their minds, and remember the great times we all shared and know that they wouldn’t miss this reunion for the world?

I’ll take a risk to be corny, and to be called mushy or whatever else they come up with for me after reading my invitation. I just feel content that I’m not waiting to let these people know how special they are, before it’s too late.

I started laughing at the thought of my friend Bill who is one of the swimmers that I see on a regular basis. I met him the first day that I started which happened to be his first day too. I’ve seen him develop into a very strong swimmer over the course of the last few months. He works hard every day and is one of the top swimmers on our team.

First of all, his dedication to his goal of swimming is unmatched. There isn’t any other person besides one woman, Nikki, (who happens to have 4 kids!) who can claim at being at as many practices. I’m not exactly sure what he does professionally, but I do know that he is very successful. That is no surprise because of his strong work ethic.

What is so impressive about him is his attitude. He’s serious when he needs to be and works hard at becoming the best. Because he pushes himself, he automatically pushes others. Then when the hard sets are done, he congratulates others and jokes around a bit.

One day I was walking with him after practice to the locker rooms. It was around 7am. We were in the middle of a discussion and all of the sudden, the music of Gloria Estefan captured his attention and he started dancing to the beat of the music. He got so caught up in the moment of his own private dance that he completely knocked me off my feet and I erupted into an uncontrollable belly laugh.

I’ve remembered and laughed at that dance since then more than once. It may have not been so funny, but at 7 o’clock in the morning, and watching a 35+ year old man dance in his Speedo in the middle of a hallway by himself, now THAT’S funny! What I liked and admired about that was his ability to be playful and to not be intimidated by the situation around him. He felt like dancing so he danced. He didn’t mind who may have been watching, he just wanted to celebrate the music in his own way.

I don’t know many people who could actually carry that off and be so entertaining instead of looking ridiculous. But Bill is the type of guy that gains his respect first so he can act any ol’ way he wants to and it’s fine.

So take a minute and think about someone you know? What is it that makes them charismatic? It doesn’t have to be their intelligence, their good looks or their money or power that makes them this way. It can be one silly moment, of someone dancing to their own tune.

My husband and I took our dog for a walk last night. We live in NYC and there is never any way to know what excitement that you will wander upon. Last night we heard some deep gospel sounds coming from a park near Lincoln Center so we wandered over to check out the event.

As we stood in the back with the other dog owners, a gray terrier and another brown dog came over to greet our dog Mallory. In New York, people always ask what the name of the dog is, but rarely take the time to meet and greet the person. Meanwhile, the owners politely wait as the dogs check each other out, and usually move on. This time however, the owner of the terrier, struck up a conversation with us. He told us that his other dog passed away over a month ago and was starting to look for a second dog as a companion for his 4-½ year old terrier. He asked how Mallory was to train, and how smart she was and whether or not she made a good pet. We of course loved talking about our dog and told him everything he wanted to know.

Meanwhile, this guy had a friend who was walking his dog too. The other guy never took the time to come over and say hi or comment on our dog. David, the man we were chatting with explained to Sway and me that the two of them come to NYC from New Jersey with their dogs to meet women. They say that dogs are magnets to women and that they had met quite a lot of people this way. Simultaneously, our neighbors walked by and were surprised to see us talking to David. They had just spoken with him moments before so we all laughed at the coincidence of that.

David told us that he had been married for 11 years and that he was 48 years old. His buddy, Bob, was 49 and had never been married. They both said that by the strike of midnight on the millennium, they would have the one at their side that they loved, and they vowed that each other would be no where in sight! It was apparent that both men were good guys, they were both successful, but only David took the time to strike up a conversation with others around him.

Next, David asked how Sway and I met. He was shocked to discover that we met 5 years ago on line. We met in a chat room on America On Line, and he seemed genuinely enthusiastic as we told him our story of meeting for the first time. I told him that in order to be as successful with women as he was with us, to be exactly who he was with us. He was interested in WHO we were and WHAT we were about. I explained that because men are visual, their first question on line to women is usually the typical, “what do you look like” and What are your stats?” I told him how frustrating it is to a woman to have to explain WHAT she looks like in order to have an interesting conversation. I told him that women would prefer to have a guy want to get to know her as a person first and then later, even 10 minutes later, looks can be discussed. I also told David that I tell guys on line who ask me what I look like and if I want to trade pictures even before we said hi, that I usually tell the men something that scares them . I tell men that if they have a woman to respond to their proposition, then they are probably REALLY dealing with a man posing as a woman and don’t realize it. That usually does quiet them down… and I get a laugh out of it.

When I met Sway on line, one of the most incredible things about him was his concern for me as a person. I was going through a separation at the time and he spent more time asking me my opinion of life and of my situation than of my physical attributes. He could see from my profile that I enjoyed working out and kept fit. That may have kept him involved with the conversation but I chose to think that he had depth and that was why I fell for him.

It was about that time that I noticed my husband Sway, fading fast. He had been up since 5am, just drove 2 ½ hours from Philadelphia and had nothing to eat, and had survived the Lincoln tunnel without having road rage! I quickly told David that we had to go. We traded numbers and cards and promised to call if we had an eligible friend in mind for him.

After we left Sway and I talked about how lucky we were that we found one another. WE knew it could be us walking around the streets in NY late at night hoping to bump into the love of our lifetime. But we encouraged David to upgrade his limited typing skills and then bring his social skills to the Internet. I have no doubt that David WILL meet the perfect one. He is more interested in others than sharing about himself, yet he was also very willing to share his experiences with us and to help us however he could. He was polite and friendly and enthusiastic about everything we discussed.

Meeting David was a bonus that night. We talked, we laughed and we shared tips on life. If I have a friend who is looking, for a relationship I’ll definitely keep David in mind. And so will our neighbors who met him too. And Bob? Bob had a dog, which was the first step, but he never risked anything of himself to meet anyone that night. It was my guess that Bob was hoping that people would come up to him to talk about his dog, instead of using the dog to strike up conversations. But most people would be perfectly content to just listen to the music or just watch the people. If Bob wants to meet others, he’ll HAVE to learn how to initiate. He may have been afraid of rejection which is part of life, or maybe he didn’t see the perfect woman to speak to. Meanwhile, David at least met 4 people, who have 2 friends, who have 2 friends…..

I wonder which one will find their soulmate before New Years Eve? I wonder which one will be dancing under the stars with a woman who is searching the world for him too? I wonder which one will try different ways to meet people who may set him up with women they think would be a good match? Sorry Bob, I’m putting my money on David.